From Dishes to The Corporate Ladder in 2.5 Seconds August 31, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Apartment Life, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World.
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It’s new theory time. This one I’ve been mulling over for a while now. I think you can learn a lot about the way a person lives their life by how they do their dishes.
I’ve lived with several people and families overtime and when doing dishes I’ve always noticed that the way they stack their dishes is, probably, too opposite of mine in someway. Some were just amusing while other’s irked me to the point where I wanted to disassembled the dish rack and put them back in. Mine generally, looks something like a perfectly placed puzzle. To me doing dishes is a process, it’s relaxing, it’s not something I look forward to but not something I hate doing either. It’s very reminiscent of my day, doing “chores” that may not be the most pleasant experience but hey, it’s all in a days work. I always try to organize the rack as compact as possible, filling little holes with little objects, putting big plates next to big plates, mugs next to mugs. When I walk into a kitchen and see a big plate tipping over into Tupperware which is sitting on top of a glass and there’s a big blank hole next to it that’s taken by a single spoon…I freak out. I am by no means an OCD neat freak (…somewhere my mother’s is laughing at the sheer idea of that.) but I live in organized chaos. Chaos and spontaneity are fun when everything else is in its place. Once all the boxes are labeled and put into their cubbies you’ve got plenty of room to dance, see the concept???
I once lived with a dear old couple who, for the life of them, could not agree on silverware. She wanted to place all the silverware facing down so that no one was breathing on the spoons and forks they’d later be putting in their mouth. He, on the other hand, insisted on putting them upright complaining that the bottom of the drying tray was filled with old water residue. Seeing both, very valid points, I’d adjust my dishwashing methods to whoever was home at the time or would be home first. Here’s where you stop reading because I’m analyzing silverware and comparing it to why God made giraffes, I personally love giraffes but this has nothing to do with that. I’m just saying your dish rack reflects your life or how you’d like it to be.
My parent’s can tell you countless stories of “Sofia…how long is that dirty plate going to sit on the counter? hm?” but growing older I’ve found myself become more and more…dare I say it…an adult! It’s as if what I want and where I’m going directly affect my household. I walked into my apartment the other day, took one look at the kitchen and went to town with Clorox wipes, 409 and re-organizing the cabinets to better accommodate my decorative Eeyore, Ikea and Yankee’s mugs. If that doesn’t say adolescent to mother of 3 in 2.5 seconds than I don’t know what will.
I think we’ve all got our quirks about our lives; there are people who are OCD like no other and some who can leave a flip-flop in the middle of the living room and not even blink. How you stack things, put things away, file things in your closet or drawers is how you want your life to be, not necessarily how it is. I’ll throw my sweater on the chair and let it live there for a week or keep paper clips, gum wrappers, dead pens in the bottom of my handbag but let me tell you friends, when it’s clean-up time Mary Poppins freakin pops out of my body and into the room. It’s a spik n’span, dosey-doe, heel clicking adventure and once everything is in its proper nook it’s staying that way for a while!
Maybe I’ve got waaay to much time on my brain (cause trust me, time is NOT on my hands) to analyze and actually write about these things but the human brain never ceases to amaze me. How we do what we don’t realize we’re doing is baffling and thrilling all at once! And believe you me…you’re gonna notice every dish rack you pass until the end of time now, mwwahaha. My evil plan to take over your kitchen one step at a time is working
Sunday Funnies August 29, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Humor.
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To my own sheer amazement and amusement I’ve found little wrong with the human race recently. I know! Perhaps its my insane working hours that filter into my social activities that’s causing me to miss all genuine stupidity but really, in all fairness I haven’t had much to write about in the form of cynicism! DLIH is slowly becoming a serious site about cultural growth in our society…eww, if this continues I’m going to start posting pictures of circus monkeys dressed at Cher just to lighten the mood. (I’m only half kidding…). As August rounds out the summer and we start to sulk about the Fall approaching with all its responsibilities I felt that now would be a pretty appropriate time to kill all thought process with humor. I’ve been collecting YouTube videos over the last few weeks, videos that made me laugh, made me cry, made me procrastinate at work as I stared at long task lists in my outlook. I want to pass on the smiles and tears and most of all, the laziness
Don’t work too hard kids:
Indian Pole Gymnastics. The new kind of pole dance!
California Gays..the original California Girls
(And the sister video)…
Nassau (County) State of Mind
*disclaimer: only funny to those from Long Island (Check out the Isles T-shirt!!!)
Stripper Fail…don’t try this at home kids. or ever. (Video is off youtube but follow this link to see it!!! http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/01d6dc4e70/stripper-fail)
AND one for the hockey fans out there! Geno: The Jokster
Shoebox For Your Heart August 26, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Men, Relationships, Women.
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This may be totally out of the context of our physical year but I can’t help it, inside I’m gushing about nostalgic moments and grown-up choices. Do you remember when you were in elementary school and as Valentine’s Day approached your teacher gave you the assignment of the year – make a Valentine’s Day mailbox. You’d go home and promptly tell your mother you needed a shoebox and construction paper. I don’t remember many of my own vividly but I do remember that, even at that young age, my DLIH motto was pumping through my veins. Mine had to be the most original, colorful, and exciting out of the entire class! Once, I even made it into a Panda Bear! So…what happened? Why am I sitting in my East Village apartment drinking white wine out of a blue plastic cup (…do as I say, NOT as I do! Don’t you ever let me catch you drinking wine out of plastic!) , contemplating what’s next. What’s next for work, what’s next for life, what’s next for this school thing I want to do and mostly (because I’m drinking wine,) what do I do about this person I can’t stop smiling around, the same person I am not allowed to fall for? Thank you Fate, the trickery and betrayal is much appreciated.
I don’t know when things got complicated, I’m pretty sure I once made a vow to never say those words in regards to dating but once you’re this working, rent paying, alcohol drinking, heel wearing adult it no longer becomes a choice. Complication is just something you deal with. Complication because the person you’re really not supposed to care about at all is blatantly falling for you too….problem. Huge fat-man-on-a-crowded-subway problem. I mean, have you ever just been in a situation where it’s not as simple as “I hope he asks me out.” Where other people are involved and there are other risks that aren’t normally associated with dating. Do you let shit hit the fan and run with it, all for love? Or do you stop and rationalize what the proper decision would be, do we even have a choice? Are feelings disregarded feelings that grow until they explode? Worst of all, I keep wondering, is this hard because this is real?
I went out the other night with some girlfriends I hadn’t seen in years. We weren’t out to get trashed or meet anyone, just wanted to enjoy the night but regardless, eyes will wander. I saw more good-looking men in one tiny bar than I had in a some time and while I was intrigued and secretly hoping they’d talk to me I really had no intention of seeing any cards that may be dealt that evening. My phone number had no intention of leaving the comforts of its Blackberry device and it made me wonder what this new “thing” going on in my mind was. With a plethora of interesting, pretty men before me I could have cared less, because it was normal, it was easy and I knew that I had nothing in common with the Nordstrom’s Sale Rack of male at my fingertips. So, when I finally met a man, months ago, that could keep up with SK and challenge her and push her and piss her off, I wasn’t necessarily surprised that getting that great thing would require climbing through thorns and barbed wire….but is it worth it?
I never realized how many people out there may be feeling the same thing I’m feeling, that unknowing of what to feel. Do I go ahead and follow my life as it’s leading me or do I feed into caution and put other’s feelings before my own even if it may, in the end, make me miserable? I say this next sentence as I laugh – is there even a right answer? During my contemplation of the situation I have over and over run the opening scene of “The Holiday”, when Kate Winslet describes her unrequited love for her boss. I by NO means am in love with my boss (insert awkward, laughing then terrified face HERE!) but I do wonder about that short bit of film; would that speech be much different than my own?
Snow White or Batman or Winnie the Pooh with candy hearts indicating love and hugs and snickers with funny little red and pink wrappers would scatter about as you’d empty the cardboard creation you worked so hard on. Much the way the elements of lust or love scatter as you empty all the honesty out of your heart but the rule of Valentine’s Day mailboxes is that you have to bring a Valentine for everyone…in love there is no such thing. You’ll find glances from across the room and phone calls that are meant not to mislead but you’ll never open your mailbox and find a heart just laying there, waiting for you.
…or will you?
Caring Made Easy August 23, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, GoodGuys File, Men, Women.
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The GoodGuys File
Women are notorious for many things, some we’re proud of, others we’ll pretend we don’t have a clue but bring a group of us around a table, hand us a bottle of wine and we’ll tell you what MEN are notorious for. It’s a common misconception that women enjoy this sort of bashing gossip, admittedly I’m guilty of that small pang of sheer joy too, but a second of revenge doesn’t really match up to the months or even years of heartache we go through just to figure out what men want from us.
Being women, some of us are definitely more of the nurturing type than others, nothing wrong with that, myself- I’m what I like to call a hidden housewife. I may parade around in heels, but I’ll be parading around my kitchen with a spatula in one hand a needle and thread in the other. Something about caring for other people brings me great joy so when it comes to relationships, as independent as I am, I have a strong hand in being the caregiver too. Generally, an addiction to another human being (because, lets me honest, when you like someone THAT much, you are addicted.) results from a genuine fascination and attraction to them. When those feelings aren’t reciprocated the love becomes unrequited and the game turns into the one between your head and your heart rather than that of two individuals. Most of us, nowadays, are pretty familiar with the idea of caring about someone that doesn’t care about you with the same intensity but I had no idea that that pain was only the half of it. I spent about twelve months, off and on, in love with someone who “liked” me. Someone who didn’t want me to date other people, someone who’d talk to me on the phone till 2am and make me laugh, someone who’d drive me around in his car singing songs on the radio with me. Someone I couldn’t help but stare at but in the end that someone was the same person that wouldn’t let me care about him….that was the strangest pain I’d ever known. I wouldn’t say it was hurtful or intense, it was discomforting, like the way children feel when they’ve lost their blankey. All I wanted to do was run into his arms, run my fingers down his back and sweep the hair out of his face, kiss him in public because I could and hold his hand while we went to Ikea. None of that ever happened, I never cooked him dinner or helped him buy presents for his sister, nor did he ever let me meet his friends. It dawned on me one day, I was an outside specimen to his world, I was just another part of a larger picture, I was simply a puzzle piece, nothing more. Seeing as we don’t have an emotional off switch or better yet, a master power cable, feelings didn’t go away just because I wanted them to and the need and want to care kept pumping through my body. It was exhausting. When I first started dating TheGoodGuy I was shocked and taken aback, not only did he allow me to care about him but he wanted me to….wait, he wanted me to? He was always telling me how much things “meant” to him and how he “appreciated” stuff I did or even how much he wanted me to do things again! I had never known someone who could let me be nurturing and he had never known anyone that wanted to care so much. We became THAT couple, you know, the one you see on the street and want to slap, the kind that seem like they’re in a gushy movie and even the ones you want to hand a hotel room key too…sorry, yes, it was probably me that one weekend, on that corner…sorry. I was aware of it and part of me was a little embarrassed but mostly I wouldn’t realize it till after the fact, everything about this new relationship felt right to the point where I’d often look at him and say “What planet did you come from?”. The point I’m trying to make, the one I’ve been trying to explain for years is that caring about someone isn’t hard but it’s also a human factor, you either do or you don’t. Even pancake mix comes with instruction on the back of the box, I know, but if we were born knowing how to make round little blobs of yummy goodness we wouldn’t need those guidelines, caring about someone is the same. We just know how. I think, with the mass overload of information women get, one of our biggest mistakes is waiting for a guy to see what you see. No matter how many cookies you bake or time you offer to lend an ear so he can vent, no matter how great you look sometimes he will never care about you in that way, he may not even know you’re expecting him to and yes, telling him might scare him. I know it feels incomprehensible that one day someone will just care the way you want them to but chances are they will and it’ll be better than holding out for Mr. I “like” you. There’s no easy way to go about learning that lesson so it’s better to just go through it. Cry about it, hate it, fight with yourself and pretend you don’t see the truth because the day you find someone that will hold your hand because it’s too hard to stand next to you and not touch, that day you’ll understand the other guy wasn’t worth it. Never regret the pain you go through, it makes your love stronger.
I Like Your Blog Award August 22, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Review.
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Lianna J of Designer Jeans and Ramen Noodles has award DLIH the I LIKE YOUR BLOG Award!
and new blog, restock
The Things We Don’t Do August 20, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, Life Lessons/Growing Up, MTA/Public Transportation, Real World, Relationships.
Why is it we do the things we don’t do?
I’m about to tell you your life story so be prepared. You’re sitting on the subway and the cutest guy ever steps on and sits down right across from you, he looks up and smiles. You burry your eyes back into your book. For the next 8 stops you play the “I’m not looking” game with each other and then you get up and you get off at your stop. You don’t stop thinking about him for the next week, you never see him again. What is it about being impulsive and daring in a situation that seems to be weaved by Fate that makes us so hesitant? Is it the mentality of “Why should I bother, I’m never going to see this person again?”…that’s how it’s always been for me. Sitting, thinking, praying that the other person will make the move, all the while they’re probably thinking the same thing.
I’m reading a great book called The Celestine Prophecy, it talks of the inexistence of coincidences, something I have always truly believed. Everything is in our life for a reason, every moment is a link in the chain to the next moment. We walk around complaining that “the one” is out there somewhere and we wish we could find them but maybe we have missed the mark? Maybe subway boy or central park girl or your waitress was the link you were supposed to clasp?
I feel like there are only two schools of thinking and you have to choose the one that’s closest to what’s in your heart. Fate gives you lemons and you make lemonade and if you don’t, the lemons disappear. Poof gone, magic! You’re given one chance to make due with what you’ve got and if you pass it by it’s gone, you’re never going to see that person again. The second way of looking at it is perhaps the one I prefer more. Things happen as they’re meant to happen in a sequential order. If you sat down on the same subway a year later and the same guy got on then it’s only emphasizing that the conversation between you two is inevitable, so put the ball into motion. Kick that thing like a 4th grader in gym class! You may score a homerun! It’s a risk but you never planned to see him again, so here’s the second chance you’re definitely never going to get again.
I don’t think there’s a right answer to this question, we could slap ourselves for the chances we don’t take but dwelling on it won’t do the world any good, no endangered species will be saved by your self inflicted stress. After pondering this entire theory for a few days, I came to the conclusion that I’m going to act more, I’m going to throw things out there and test life. The farthest you can fall is the ground and at 5’6″…I’m not really awfully tall enough to be afraid of that. Bruises on my ass can heal, I promise.
The Right Puzzle Pieces August 16, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Dating, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Relationships.
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I’m going to be totally honest with you, up until just recently I tried very hard to find a guy that would make me happy. I knew that being with someone great would make me wake up every morning smiling, would give me something to look forward to and something to put my energy into and it worked. I bounced around like a light-up bouncy ball from Toys “R” Us and giggled at little nothings and after about three weeks, a month, two months I’d fall so far back into the hole of loneliness that I didn’t know what to do with myself. “What am I doing wrong?” “What’s wrong with me?” “I don’t understand what I did to deserve this”….sound familiar? Even the most confident of people have stood in front of the mirror and stared at their reflection trying to find the imperfection, focusing on what that something is that’s making everyone leave you. Just when I’d feel better the cycle would begin again, I’d find a cute boy and know that if we hit it off I’d be happy.
….and then something else happened. I got a promotion at work. I got something I had worked hard for, worked four years to achieve, something that scared the shit out of me when I finally got it and happiness stopped being about a boy. Happy was a normal, everyday thing, happy was going home after a full day of work and knowing I did something well, happy was hearing my alarm and knowing I had a meeting that day and not being nervous anymore. It gave me an edge, like no matter how tall you were, I was still taller, no matter how fast you walked, I surpassed you, when you could sing the song best, I could sing it brighter. A lot of people didn’t understand, I believe they still don’t. A lot of people don’t understand Doing Laundry in Heels and they’re people I once considered some of my closest friends. That’s when it began to piece together—literally. Life is like a huge puzzle with a million pieces, the trick isn’t putting those pieces together, the trick is finding WHICH pieces actually make the picture. There were a lot of things that were great in my life and they worked but they didn’t fit. I was managing my life, I was precisely scheduling everything so that it worked together like a well oiled machine and though those pieces were the right size and the right shape, they were part of a puzzle that made a different scene.
I still liked guys, I still dated guys but what used to be an obsessive giddiness just became the story I’d tell my girlfriends and then move on. I learned I could go on one date and have fun and not feel the need to go on another, I realized that someone never calling me again was not something to cry over because a man who doesn’t have the decency to break it off with you isn’t a man that’s worth knowing and I learned that regretting any of the things you did or didn’t do with people you did or did not date isn’t worth your brain power. Really, you’re only three quarters of the person you have the potential to be when you’re waiting for a significant other to make you happy. If you can be happy as a whole you can be happy as a couple because rather than trying to fill each other’s holes you’re sharing what’s already good. When I meet a great guy, and I have no doubt that one of these days very soon I will, I want to beam when I tell him about my life and all it’s worth, I want to share my job, my friends, my lifestyle with him and I want him to see how my blue eyes sparkle from the sheer idea of it all. That’s when someone falls in love with you, when you’re laughing…not when you’re trying to find a reason to.
Italian Leather is a Girl’s Best Friend August 13, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Around NYC, Shopping, Women.
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For women there are only two types of shoes: Shoes that you must have and shoes that you’ll spend the rest of your life kicking yourself if you don’t get. The first are those Christian Louboutin’s, the 5th avenue hot shots that make you stop and rewind yourself back to the window. You talk to them, coo them like the puppies you saw in the window when you were a kid, you must have them but somehow you live, you wake up the next morning and turn on the coffee machine like nothing happened. The latter are the deadly ones, the ones that are so you you’re convinced someone has been reading your mind, the ones that you could wear everyday of your life and be content, THE shoes that you know everyone will adore. Just such a pair called my name one day.
A few months ago I stumbled into Daffy’s, ironically getting an early start on Halloween costume shopping. I dug around a little but not really in the mood to design ridiculous outfits I slowly floated over to my favorite section. Over the years I’ve developed very good self control, I can actually go as far as trying shoes on and not buying them. I walked through the little aisles, Xed most of the contenders and then I stopped “Oh…My…God.” Before me lay a shoe, my glass slipper, the heel I had been searching for. Now merely a third of its original price, my eyes slowly started to water.
Ever since I was in my early teens my style has been forties/sixties inspired with a touch of boho and a bit of girl next door but my shoe style has remained exclusively old school. These shoes, real Italian leather on a three inch heel, T-strap with cut outs were the epitome of forties, working gal! I could hear my Dad in my head saying “Sofia, you don’t have the money but you’re never going to find a shoe like this again…”. With my hours at work just cut, my company going down the drain, and a bunch of bills on their way I KNEW I couldn’t buy them…but I had to. Size seven was too big, six too small, where was the half size, where?! Where?! There! There it was laying, alone…literally all alone. The right shoe was nowhere to be found. Fate was toying with me. You’re not funny my little friend.
I left but not defeated, Daffy’s has several locations in Manhattan and this girl was not about to give up! The next day I sprung out of bed determined to find my soulmates. I was practically sweating when I walked into the store, I darted right for my size and checked every box imaginable, 6.5’s were no where to be found so I started rummaging through the other sizes too. It couldn’t be possible that there wasn’t a single 6.5 in all of New York City but slowly being proven wrong I calmed myself with the notion that tomorrow was a new day and there were more stores. Suddenly, just was I was about to leave a T-strap caught my eye, BAM, forest green leather was sticking right up out of the box, the sign said 10-10.5 but you couldn’t fool me, the back of that shoe was tiny. I ran over grabbed the box and dashed to the mirror, I slipped the heavenly heels on and perfection overcame my entire body! Even the sales guy stopped to look. Angel’s sang! Unfortunately, so did my credit card but it was a small (very small!) price to pay for bliss.
For women there are only two types of shoes: Shoes that you must have…and shoes you will always wear like a diamond ring.
Extra, Extra! August 11, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Uncategorized.
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Remember to keep checking NEWS to find out whats up with SK, DOING LAUNDRY IN HEELS and the fabulous world of silly, sarcastic, realism
Not Just Another Andra August 11, 2010Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Review.
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It was just yesterday that this little girl and I laid on the floor of a ballet studio giggling about something we called “belly button men”….okay, so it wasn’t yesterday, it was twelve years ago. Never did I expect that one day I’d be sitting in the NYC subway listening to her sweet beats and harmonies on my I-pod! Andra, a new artist from award winning producer Kerry “Krucial” Brothers, totally breaks boundaries with her racy lyrics. What does DLIH love more than honest, hard-core, cut-throat truth?! Her songs are about everything from how breaking up hurts, to money is a girl’s best friend, to sex and love. Her debut mixtape/album entitled Love is 4 Suckaz/I’m a Sucka 4 Love is an eclectic mix of pop, hip-hop, R&B some pretty sick songs that will end up on the dance floor, I would know! My personal favorites are Credit Card, White Swans and Obsessed. What new artist do you know that breaks onto the scene with Drake, Kid Cudi and Lupe Fiasco ALL on her album, among others!
You can download the album for free now at http://www.loveis4suckaz.com/ and follow her on Twitter and Facebook! She’s a sexy mama with a new, clean sound. Nothing like her on the airwaves and I’m not just saying that because we probably have ratty old friendship bracelets lying around somewhere, this girl is the real thing. Sheer talent in a petite frame, just like a firecracker!