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The Wishing Right November 6, 2011

Posted by doinglaundryinheels in Friendships, Life Lessons/Growing Up, Real World, Relationships.

As many of you probably know, this Scorpio baby recently celebrated her birthday. Over the past week, I received much love and attention from people dear to me, at times, so much so, that it brought tears to my eyes. While I may not be thirty, flirty and fabulous quiet yet, I’ve definitely grown out of my high school bloomers and unnecessary ego boosting. Every year every one of us celebrates a birthday, now, I’m not going to sit on my angelic butt claiming I’ve never reached out to someone on their birthday specifically because it was their birthday, but I’m also not going to condone wishing people a happy holiday, of any nature, when that’s all you’re doing, purposelessly. Look, the best thing about a birthday is that everyone has one! So it’s great to wish them a happy day of birth and partying but there are some people, who should know, that they no longer possess the wishing right…

I don’t really understand this culture of wishing people happy birthday because it’s their birthday. Sure, maybe you went to high school together and it happened to pop up on your Facebook. I’m sure it’s taken as a nice gesture, that you went out of your way, for 3.87 seconds to wish someone happy birthday. I really have no problem with that, what I do have a problem with is people who don’t understand that by them wishing you a happy birthday it’s making your birthday neither happy nor wishful…if anything, you’d wish for them to GO AWAY.

While I like to keep this site clean, I’m going to get a little French here, because frankly, I don’t know how to put this any other way: At what point during the month does someone look at their Facebook, see that it’s someone’s birthday and think “Hey! I made their life a living hell and then shitted all over it…I think I’ll be sure so text them Happy Birthday in the morning. Happy Freakin’ Birthday, how the hell are ya?…remember that time you wanted to throw garbage at my face? Oh man, I miss those days.” I mean seriously!…what are people thinking?! We aren’t long lost relatives, we aren’t classmates, we aren’t friends, we don’t even shop at the same super market in hopes of never seeing each other again. On what planet is it some sort of kind gesture to wish me happy birthday? All of you out there thinking this could be a sign they want to rectify the situation, stop it, you know it’s not!

…and here’s another thing, birthday party drama. I’ve finally learned to let things go, let things happen the way they’re going to happen, but that doesn’t change the underlying factor that it’s my birthday and I’d like to celebrate it with you. On your birthday, you can dig a cave in central park and burry yourself in it for a week, if that’s what you want to do. I feel like over the past years, I’ve traveled high and wide, long and far, done backflips with scheduling to make sure I could make someone’s special day. It’s pretty rough and tough on the birthday balloon parade when someone’s excuse for not attending is “it’s really far to travel…”. Yes. A whole 45 minutes, dear Lord, you could be dead by then! Living in New York City, everyone’s got to take their tequila with a big ole’ lime of scheduling. Some people work weird hours, some people have prior engagements, some people have families and babies, those are legitimate reasons for elegantly excusing yourself from one’s birthday basherina, but texting that you’ve had a rough day and want to hit the sack early? ::insert obnoxious buzzer noise here::.

My mother always tells me to grow-up “You’re not five anymore, people don’t make big deals out of their birthdays”. Maybe we don’t. Maybe we shouldn’t. Maybe staying up till 4am boozing and dancing our assess off while wearing pretty things and getting hugs and kisses from everyone is absolutely, totally, not at all like putting on your party dress and glaring at the neatly wrapped boxes, as your friends eat pizza at Chuck E Cheese. It’s totally not the same. Mom. I’m fully aware that as we get older things change, lives become complicated and some people just flat out don’t enjoy their birthdays but everyone gets a birthday, everyone. So before you act, think about how you’d want to be appreciated on your birthday…and if the answer is get cow dung thrown at you, by all means, dung away. However, I have a funny feeling, it’s probably not ;)


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